My Grammy

It's hard to imagine the day you will receive "the call" that one of your loved ones is very ill or has passed. There has been a lot of those calls lately, but I never quite imagined that I'd receive the one I got on Thursday.

After months of planning, prayers, and preparation, the day had arrived for our family to leave on our 2 week mission trip to Chiang Mai, Thailand with Let's Start Talking. We had just reached that point where we could finally breathe again after the crazy morning and we couldn't believe we were about to embark on this exciting journey. 10 minutes before boarding, Chad's phone rang and I knew by the look on his face that something was not good. My grandmother and grandfather had just been in a terrible car accident and although Grandpa was ok, Grammy was going to be life-flighted to another hospital. About that time, the announcement came over the speaker and it was time to board the plane. Really?? Why now? Why not give me a few more minutes to figure this out? Do I need to NOT get on that plane? Should I stay or should I go? But I didn't have time to think. I just went...crying the entire way.

It wasn't until we arrived in Dallas that Dad called me to tell me the horrible news. We were running from one end of the DFW airport to the other because our flight was late and although I knew we needed to keep running, I was suddenly paralyzed. How could this possibly be? God, why in heaven's name did this have to happen at all, but especially right now? Right when I can't go? I felt like I was choosing Thailand over my grandmother. I really didn't know what to do. God whispered a little reminder in my ear though that His plan is perfect and that every single hurdle Satan has thrown in our path has been to keep us from Thailand. How far he will go to get what he wants. I was also reminded that getting on that plane to continue my trip would be exactly what my Grammy would have wanted me to do.

Having loads of time to reflect on my grandmother made me grateful that God had granted me some special times with her these last few months. In October, my kids and I stayed with her on our way to Shreveport to see my cousin. (Another tragic event this year, however, I am now grateful that we made that trip.) We had so much fun while there. Grams made our beds so fluffy and comfortable and we stayed up laughing and talking about everything. She showed us all her pictures that she was so very proud of in her sewing room and listed off even more that she didn't have room for but remembered and loved. She treasured those pictures.

The next morning, she took us to breakfast at the Moosehead downtown, a place that Jackson claims as his favorite ever since. We enjoyed our time so much together and she told us all about everyone that walked through the door. That was Grammy...she knew everyone and everyone loved her because of her sweet heart and kind ways.

On our way back from seeing Courtney, we almost kept driving through, as I was anxious to return home, but thank God, He urged me to stay one more night. We had a tea party, Grammy made us breakfast and then she spoiled my kids and washed their hair in the kitchen sink. This was something special she did for me and my sister when we visited her many years ago and it was a precious moment watching her share that with them. Of course, she pretended to be Stacy from "What Not to Wear" which was an addition to our past washes. I got to play the role of Clinton, which she laughed and laughed about. She had the most adorable, contagious laugh and I miss it already. I also regret not going to see her more. I hate that I didn't, but I will treasure that special time that my kids had with her forever. I know that they will too!

On Grammy's birthday in October, my aunt planned a surprise lunch for her and had all of us meet to celebrate her birthday. Getting all of us together is not an easy task, but it happened this time.

It is as if God was blessing us with these special times before it was her time. Thank you God!!

Here are a few of my favorite memories of Grammy:

Car rides listening to gospel music on our way to/from her house

Making things with her in her kitchen

Going for walks

Visiting her in Colorado

Receiving birthday cards from her (They were always specially picked out and underlined in special parts!)

Dressing up in her pj's and singing "Second Hand Rose"

Getting my hair washed

Taking trips to the farm

Shopping trips

Staying at her beautiful house

Laughing with her and her sisters

And much more.

Grams, I still can't believe that you are gone. My heart hurts and I'm almost convinced that I couldn't have made it through telling you goodbye. I hate to think about what happened to you, because I can't stand the thought that you were in pain. I'm so glad that you aren't anymore.

You made all of our lives so happy and there will be an empty place forever now that you are gone.

I love you, I love you, I love you.